Anya's Dream Date?
by Jedi Ari
Summary: Anya, a 15 year old girl gamer with a crush on Snake, gets her wish...or so she thought. Some spoilers. Complete! Kplus for minor swearing. [Written for silliness, not seriousness.]
1. The Meeting

**Author's note(s): All right, first off, I don't own Metal Gear Solid or Metal Gear Solid 2 or any of its characters/components. Hideo Kojima and Konami do. Also, the upcoming installments of this will be delayed until after Christmas so I can play MGS all the way through first. ^^;; And on with the cheesiness!** 

Anya leaned back, releasing the Playstation 2 controller from her grip. She sighed contently and watched the credits roll.  
  
"Hideo Kojima...Hideo Kojima...Hideo Kojima. Boy, did he make the whole game?" she asked, chuckling. "Too bad he said he wouldn't be back for another one. It was funny to see Raiden running around nude."  
  
Anya glanced back at her small, McFarlane Toys action figure of Solid Snake.  
  
"It should've been Snake. At least he wouldn't be...pasty." She shuddered at the thought. Anya checked out her watch.  
  
"Dang, I oughta get to bed. I need at _ least_ four hours of sleep for that LAN party tomorrow." Anya switched the PS2 to sleep mode and grabbed her Snake figurine.  
  
She jumped into bed, setting Snake on her shelf above the bed. Anya laughed as she shrugged the covers over her shoulders.  
  
"Night, Snake-sweetie." She lay on her back and sighed. "Too bad you weren't real...and a few years younger." She paused. "Make that eighteen. Only 3 years older than me, not too bad." Anya's teeth flashed in the darkness. "He'd still have that scruffy beard thing going on..."  
  
She began to drift off. "I wish he were real..." 

****

A light glowed around the figurine when she was asleep. It grew. And grew. It broke the shelf, and an eighteen-year-old boy's figure landed on the bed. Before he could awake, his head hit the headboard and he was knocked unconscious.

****

Anya blinked her eyes slowly open. She took in the sunlight, and her eyes adjusted. She felt something next to her on the bed.   
  
"Java, get off the bed, kitty," Anya mumbled, turning over. Her eyes went wide open as she took in a man's face next to her.  
  
She screamed, and the man's eyes opened. He screamed back, but deeper and more in response than in shock.  
  
Anya scrambled out of the bed, falling on the floor. She felt around for her baseball bat and stood up quickly, her hair in her face. She blew it away.  
  
"Who...are you, and what the HECK are you doing in my BED!!?!"  
  
The man stood up and calmly took her in. He pulled a gun and pointed it at her forehead. She put up her hands, dropping the bat.  
  
"Who are you?" he growled. She blinked. The gun quivered. "Who are you!?!"  
  
_That voice..._ She blinked again, and tilted her head to the side. _Younger, but deep and...throaty..._  
  
"Answer me: who are you?!" he shouted.  
  
"A...Anya." She gulped. "Sn...Snake?"  
  
He tensed. "How did you know? Who are you working for?"  
  
"Snake..." She fainted dead away. 

****

He holstered his M9 and walked around the bed. Snake knelt down to the girl's level and checked for a pulse. After being certain she was still alive, he threw the bat to the other side of the bed.  
  
He sat down and put a hand through his hair. Where was he? And why was he in this girl's bedroom?   
  
Snake took his M9 out again. When the girl awoke, he'd answer her. 

****

Anya woke to a gun muzzle pointed in her face. She tried to scream, but a hand covered her mouth. Her eyes frantically searched for the person the hand belonged to.  
  
"Shh. Now, when I take my hand off, you're not going to scream. You got that?" Snake ordered. Anya nodded quickly, her eyes wide. He nodded, and slowly took his hand away.  
  
Anya swallowed before she spoke. "Um, why are you pointing a gun at me?"  
  
"So you'll answer some questions. Now, where am I?"  
  
"In my room," she said slowly.  
  
"I can tell that. Don't play dumb. Where am I?"  
  
"You're in Wisconsin...Eau Claire..." She closed her eyes. "Please don't hurt me Snake-swee--um, Snake."  
  
"Good. Now, why am I here?"  
  
That was a good question. _How am I supposed to answer that?_ she thought. _'Um, yeah, you were an action figure that was on my shelf and I accidentally wished you to live.' Sure, that's gonna work._  
  
He pushed the gun a bit closer. "Why am I here?"  
  
"I don't know! I kind of just found out myself..." _Well, that's sort of the truth,_ Anya thought. She gulped again. "I woke up and there was a guy in my bed. Namely, you."  
  
"How do you know my name?" Snake questioned.  
  
"Um, er...you're a video game character?" she tried.  
  
He kicked her. "I'm not in the mood for humor. Who told you my name? Who do you work for?"  
  
"Um, Otacon did! Yeah, that's it. Otacon--"  
  
"How do you know Otacon!"  
  
_He's a video game character, too,_ she sighed to herself. She closed her blue eyes. _Come on, Anya, you can do better than that. Think think think...think like Kojima-san..._  
  
"He contacted me. He couldn't help you on this one, Snake."  
  
"Why?" he snarled.  
  
_Think, girl, or you're gonna be sleeping again..._  
  
"He's the one who's been taken. He only had enough time to contact me before the nanos went out." She shrugged inside. _That works._  
  
He pulled the gun out of her face, but didn't put it away.  
  
"Switch to the Codec." He reached for his ear.  
  
_Crap, nanos! _She smiled hesitantly and did the same. _Crap crap CRAP!_  
  
"Can you hear me?"  
  
Her eyes went wide again. She _could_ hear him! What was going on? She shook her head. Solid Snake was alive, 18, and in her bedroom. Don't question things.  
  
"Yeah, I hear you."  
  
"Who was Otacon taken by? Why did they take him?"  
  
"I--I'm not sure, really. He just said something about Liquid..."  
  
"Liquid...Damn."  
  
"Who is he?" _This playing dumb thing ought to work..._  
  
"Never mind that." He closed his eyes and shook his head. Opening them again, he said, "Did he tell you anything else?"  
  
Anya's mind flashed to the LAN party she was missing.  
  
"A computer gaming party, today. We'd get more information there."  
  
He switched off the Codec, holstered the M9, and stood up. "Let's go."  
  
Anya stood up shakily. She closed her eyes and put a hand to her forehead.  
  
What was she getting herself into? 


	2. LAN Party HiJinks

She looked him over. Getting him into that outfit was trouble. He still looked a bit out of place, but better than before...  
  
**>>Flashback**  
  
"Snake, we're going out in public. You've got to change clothes!" Anya shouted.  
  
"What's wrong with this?" He gestured to his green-blue jumpsuit. Anya tried not to laugh. It looked okay in the game, but in real life...  
  
"Its good for sneaking, yeah, but in normal life you'd be spotted immediately." Anya ran downstairs to her dad's room. "Follow me."  
  
As Snake made his way down the stairs, Anya watched with a giggle. He walked like a girl with a dress on down the stairs. Snake noticed.  
  
"What's so funny?"  
  
She coughed. Better not tick off Snake again. She'd have another gun pointed to her head in no time.  
  
"Nothing. Now, let's see what my dad has down here..."  
  
Snake noticed a mirror next to the staircase and peered into it. Anya could hear him gasp from the next room.  
  
"What is it, Snake?" Anya jogged back in, some clothes in hand.  
  
He was rubbing his face, looking closely at it.  
  
"I...I'm...young."  
  
Anya went crosseyed. _Side effect of the wish..._  
  
To her surprise, Snake grinned, something she had never seen him do.   
  
"Nice." He turned to her. "Find anything, er, 'normal?'"  
  
Anya nodded. She handed him the contents in her hand. Snake held up the shirt for inspection.  
  
He was silent for a long moment. "...flannel?"  
  
Anya shrugged. "What can I say? My dad took all his work clothes with him on a business trip. That's all he had left." Snake gave her a stare that shot daggers. "Don't look at me! So you'll look like a lumberjack for a while, get over it!"  
  
Anya went back up the stairs. "You'd better be up here in that outfit By the time I'm done with my shower."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Just as Anya got back out of the bathroom, she heard Snake coming back up the stairs. She turned around, toweling her hair dry.  
  
"This is normal?" he asked. Anya wanted to laugh so bad.   
  
"Better than before. C'mon, we'll be late." She threw the towel in the bathroom and pulled him out the door.  
  
**>>End flashback  
**  
"Did Otacon say what our informant would look like?" Snake whispered as they walked in the door.  
  
"Shh! Whatever you do, don't talk." Anya straightened up. _ Someone might recognize your voice. If they brought up Metal Gear Solid 2...  
_  
Snake's face contorted oddly, but he nodded once.  
  
Anya went and took her normal place in the LAN party seating arrangement. She settled down and booted up the computer.  
  
"Took you long enough to come," Matt, aka DaNgErBoY, muttered. "We're getting our butts kicked by these losers!" Anya heard a splat from DaNgErBoY's computer and he cursed.  
  
"But they're the same people as before, last week, right?" Anya asked as she logged on to the server.  
  
"Yeah, but they have a new clan leader. He's a freak." DaNgErBoY pointed to a middle-aged and balding man sitting in the middle of the rival Half-Life clan. "He doesn't even have to talk to any of those guys. Its like they're wired or talking telepathically or something."  
  
Anya glanced at the man. She immediately noticed that one of his hands was constantly to one ear. So were the rest of his team's.  
  
_What the heck is going on here? _ Anya thought. The man stared back, then abruptly put his other hand on the keyboard. His teammates did the same. Anya shook her head. "Freaky," she whispered.  
  
"Hey, is your friend here just gonna stand around, or is he going to play?" Matt asked, not taking his eyes from the screen.  
  
"He'll play." Anya continued firing off the shotgun as she switched the computer next to her on. "C'mon, sit down."  
  
Snake slowly sat down in the chair and watched as the computer went through boot-up. When the desktop showed up, he continued to just stare blankly at the screen. Anya almost hit herself in the head.  
  
"Snake, boot up Half-Life!" she whispered hoarsely.   
  
"Boot up _what_?"  
  
"Argh. You--" She began to boot up and set up the game for Snake. "For a top mercenary...you sure can be stupid. Doesn't even know how to use a computer...sheesh."  
  
"That's Otacon's area," Snake muttered. He grabbed the mouse and began clicking. Shots fired off on the screen. "Cheap VR..."  
  
Anya sighed. She was going to explain the control mechanics of Half-Life when an odd character walked in. A young woman, around 20 or so, dressed in a short skirt and fluffy pink longsleeved shirt sauntered in. Snake took notice.  
  
"Hello..." he said quietly. Anya grunted and smacked Snake in the stomach. The woman walked up to them.  
  
"Hello. Snake? And Kitty I presume?" she said. Snake stood up, and Anya just sat for a moment. Kitty... She glanced at her login name.  
  
Dagger Kitty. Her fake codename she had made for an old MGS fanfic. That was her name now, she guessed. She stood up now.  
  
"Yeah. You are?"  
  
The woman glanced around. She saw quite a few of the young men on the computers staring at her.   
  
"Is there somewhere private we can talk?" Anya nodded slowly and led Snake and the woman to a back room of the place.  
  
"Codec," the woman said. Snake and Anya nodded.  
  
"Hear me?"  
  
"Yeah," both Snake and Anya replied.  
  
"Good. My name is Jayna. Hal sent me. Although I really can't help all too much."  
  
"What do you know about the situation?" Snake asked.  
  
Jayna sighed. "Like I said, not much. Hal only managed to tell me where he is approximately. Somewhere in the middle of the Pacific ocean."  
  
"Oh, that helps us a lot," Anya said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"We managed to get a near lock on where the artificial island is. His connection was cut before we got an exact location, but this can't be too far off."  
  
"Well? What are the coordinates?"  
  
Jayna rambled them off, along with where they could hitch a ride. She then cut the Codec connection. Before Snake or Anya could even say thank you, she had disappeared.  
  
"Whoa." Anya blinked and looked around the dark room. "Weird."  
  
Snake shrugged. "I've met weirder people." He stood up. "We'd better get going. That ride isn't going to wait that long." He stared at Anya questioningly. "...Kitty?"  
  
Anya blushed. "Well, my codename...it was...well, I'm good with knives and very graceful, so, they called me Dagger Kitty."_ Eh, what a great backstory. 'Blah blah blah, so **THEY** called me Dagger Kitty.' Whoever 'they' is._  
  
"Great. Come on." Snake walked out the door. Anya sighed happily and trotted after him.  
  
She wasn't even thinking about the fact that she had just gotten herself into more trouble than before. And she didn't even notice DaNgErBoY's eyes flashing and him yelling and cursing after her as she walked out the door. All she was focusing on was Snake and his cute headband.  
  
_Waitaminute. He still has his headband on?!?!_ "Snake!"  



	3. Hello Helicopter

**Hey y'all, Ari here! Well, I got MGS over the holiday season (yes, I played the sequel before I played the original, just like I did with Silent Hill 2...hehe), and I haven't beaten it yet, but...I'm getting a better sense of Snake's personality. Although, he does do a major out of character moment in this part especially, but it'll be explained why in a later chapter. Um, what else? Oh yeah, thanks for the kind reviews! And Snake et-al belongs to Konami and Hideo Kojima and etc, but Anya/Kitty, Jayna, and two other characters introduced in this chapter belong to me! LOL, but there is a reference to another certain fanfic author who likes MGS2 as well...see if you can pick her out (it should be easy....) And on with the story!**

"Hello! Hello? Um, excuse me! Hey!"  
  
A slide in the dark room opened on the door. A stream of light came in from the slot, but was quickly blocked by a pair of deep brown eyes.  
  
"Yes, Hal?"  
  
"Food, please?" Otacon's stomach rumbled something fierce. "Now?"  
  
"Well, aren't we a bit feisty?" The slot closed. A few minutes later, a young woman walked in, armed to the teeth with guns, and a tray of fruit salad and chicken (separate, not together of course).  
  
She walked in slowly, her high heels clicking against the cement floor. "Here, compliments of the chef." She set it down next to Otacon.  
  
He took it quickly and smelled it. He couldn't detect any chemicals (at least ones that had a scent), so he began eating the fruit.  
  
The woman sat down next to him.  
  
"How do you like your living arrangements?" She scooted closer to him. He moved away. The woman frowned and again moved closer. Otacon tried to move away again only to smack into a wall.  
  
"Not exactly desirable." He spoke around a mouthful of fruit. "What am I doing here? Where am I?"  
  
"You already know the answer to that last question, now don't you? At least, close enough for your friend to find you. Isn't that right?" She began to play with some of his hair. He shrugged her hand away.  
  
"You must be happy that you're young again, though. A new beginning, eh?"  
  
Otacon closed his eyes. "I...I don't want to talk about that. It was an accident." His mind flashed back to that time. And the outcome.  
  
"Anyway, I think your friend is bringing Snake along as well." She stood up. "If you want time to talk to her and convince Snake otherwise, we can make an agreement." Her eyes flashed at Otacon's face. He looked up slowly.  
  
"Agreement? To what?"  
  
She smiled, her sharp canines gleaming. "Here's how it goes..."  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Whoa. I never knew this was here." Anya's eyes widened as she took the helipad and the 'copter in. She looked up. "Freaky."  
  
Snake walked past her. "You've never seen a helicopter? Who did you work for before?"  
  
Anya frowned. She blew her bangs out of her eyes. "There are child labor laws, smarty. I'm only 15, after all." She stomped up next to Snake.  
  
As they approached the helicopter, a bright figure hopped out. She breathed in deeply before noticing her visitors. She waved widely and ran up to them.  
  
"Hello there! Snake, Kitty, I presume?" She looked at them in turn as she spoke. They both nodded, Anya a bit more slowly. _Another odd character...freaky..._  
  
"I'll be your pilot for this, um, flight!" she giggled. Her cap slid down over her eyes. Her mouth turned as she put the cap farther back on her head. "Stupid cap."  
  
"You know, those things do have adjuster bands," Anya pointed out. She pulled the cap off the pilot's head and tightened the band before replacing it. "That a bit better?"  
  
"Well, what do you know. Thanks!" The pilot giggled again.  
  
Snake glanced at Anya. "We're trusting our lives and Otacon's to her?"  
  
"Oh yeah! Jayna called me in special for the job. I'm, well, my real name is Tessa, but everyone calls me Snickers. No relation to the candy bar of course!" She laughed again.  
  
Anya's eyes crossed. _A _really _ odd character..._  
  
"Are you sure this thing will get us all the way to the Pacific? From Wisconsin?" Snake asked.  
  
"Oh, of course not! This thing doesn't have a big enough fuel tank to go halfway across the country and then in the middle of the Pacific, silly!" Snickers hopped into the 'copter. "We'll refuel by the coast. Hop in!"  
  
*BEEP BEEP*  
  
"Hang on a second," Snake said. He crouched and took the call, as did Anya.  
  
"Snake? Kitty? Are you there?"  
  
"Otacon!"  
  
"Hal!"  
  
"Yes, its me. I don't have long. Listen, Snake--"  
  
"Wait, why are you so rushed? You must've gotten out if you can use the Codec," Anya reasoned.  
  
"Well, actually, the woman keeping me here gave me some time, but I have three minutes, four tops, to talk to you." Otacon coughed. "Anyway, Snake, you can't come here! It turns out this has nothing to do with Liquid at all."  
  
"What? Then who was it?" Snake asked.  
  
"The woman, she used sound clips of Liquid, then put a computer-generated image of Ocelot into some sort of advanced holographic machine. She matched the movements perfectly, and--"  
  
"Why would she fake Liquid being there?"  
  
"To lure you there, more than likely," Anya pointed out.   
  
"Exactly. I don't know why, but she wants to get you here. You can't come. Leave this up to Kitty, she's qualified enough."  
  
_Leave it up to ME, the FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL who needed a strat guide to beat MGS2?!?!?_  
  
"Guys, I--I'm gonna need some help, though, you can't let me take care of it by myself!" Anya shouted. "I--I'm not qualified, I can barely use an M9!--"  
  
"I'm coming, and that's it. Anything else?"  
  
Otacon paused. "Well, this woman, she...well, she has a...a _thing_ for me, apparently."  
  
Snake snickered.  
  
"What?" Anya asked.  
  
Otacon's voice became a bit more separated. "Well, to use the Codec, she--and she um, was playing with my, my hair, and to use the Codec..." He took a deep breath. "To use the Codec, I have to take off one piece of clothing for every minute I'm on. Okay?"  
  
Anya blinked. She had never heard Otacon talk like that.  
  
Snake, on the other hand, was laughing hard. "You and...she..." He disconnected the Codec and began rolling on the ground laughing. "Otacon and...ah!"  
  
"Look, Hal, we'll come and get you. Just...get off the Codec so you don't lose any more dignity, okay?" Anya said.  
  
"All right. Is, is Snake okay?"  
  
"Yeah, he's just being a jerk--as usual. I'll take care of it. Kitty out."  
  
Anya froze. _Did I just...am I...what the heck is happening to me?  
_  
Snake's laughter broke Anya, no, Kitty out of her trance. She glared at him and kicked Snake in the stomach. The breath and laughter left him as quickly as it had come.  
  
"What...was that...for?" Snake wheezed. Kitty bent down next to him.  
  
"For being a jerk. And for ruining any..._respect_ I ever had for you. Laughing at a friend, what a...urgh..." Kitty jumped into the helicopter. She looked down at the fetal-positioned Snake. "Oh, come on, it wasn't that hard of a kick. Now are you coming or not?"  
  
Snake slowly sat up and pulled himself into the helicopter.  
  
"All right, Snickers! Ready to go!"


	4. Making an Impression

**Hey again, Ari here! Well, this chapter is short, so sorry about that...^^;;; Um, I don't own Snake or Otacon, they belong to Konami, and ah....thanks for the reviews! I think this story sucks, personally, but as long as you like it, I'll finish it! ^^ Well, enjoy!**

Otacon switched off the Codec. Hopefully Snake knew what he was doing. Although Kitty was who he was really worried about. She was qualified, but Snake didn't really care for VR trained soldiers all too much.  
  
He quickly check his watch. Four minutes. That meant--  
  
"Oh, Haalll..." The woman's figure was outlined by the light shining in from the doorway. She tapped her wrist. "Four minutes." She looked him over. "And your watch doesn't count as clothing."  
  
Otacon winced. That meant shoes, socks, coat, and shirt. He'd be half naked and freezing in the dark room.  
  
She noticed Otacon beginning to shake a bit as he took off his coat. "Don't worry." The woman walked in smiling. "We'll, ah, turn up the heat."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Snickers, where are we?" Kitty shouted over the rotors of the helicopter.   
  
Snickers glanced at her the next to her. "Not far from the coordinates you gave me. But I don't know how far off the coordinates are. Jayna told me they weren't exactly on target."  
  
Snake's eyes scanned the horizon. He caught some movement a bit far off. "I think we're not real far off. I can see some aircraft in the distance." He turned to Kitty. "Hand me the missile launcher."  
  
"Um, won't that kind of ruin the helicopter that we're in?" Kitty pointed out. She went through a few of the cases and found an old AK. "Why not use the, uh, the machine gun thing?" She handed him the AK.  
  
He looked at her. "'Machine gun thing?' Who taught you about the weapons?"  
  
"Ah, no one really..." _I never read the instructions or _intently_ listened to Otacon..._  
  
"Damn VR soldiers." He went into the back of the helicopter. "Hey, we don't even HAVE the missile launcher!"  
  
Snickers' green eyes flashed to the back. "Well, you see, we needed room for the both of you, I mean, this is a small helicopter." She shrunk into the pilot's seat. "We do have a sniper rifle, if you want that."  
  
"Yeah," Snake grunted. He rifled through the miscellaneous ammuntion and clothes to look for the PSG-1. "What's with all the clothes back here?"  
  
Snickers' face turned a deep red. "I don't have a house, and I kinda live out of my 'copter...don't look through that suitcase back there. Unmentionables...aheh..."  
  
Snake reached for the aforementioned suitcase immediately. Kitty kicked him in the butt, causing Snake to fall face-forward into the suitcase's lock and making an imprint. So much for a dream date with her hero, Solid Snake. Kitty sighed and pushed back her brown hair. This was turning into the oddest nightmare she had ever had.  
  
"Here's the sniper rifle," Kitty said, smashing the PSG-1 case into Snake's back.  
  
"What was that for?" he yelled, throwing the case off his back. It hit the back of Snickers' chair and rebounded next to Kitty.  
  
"You're being a big jerk and a perv! What is wrong with you!" Kitty shouted. "You're supposed to grab the PSG-1, not--ugh!" She grabbed the case and opened it, setting up the sniper rifle. "Never mind, I'll do it myself." She leaned down and began to adjust the scope forcefully.  
  
Snake closed his eyes. His voice changed suddenly. It became a bit softer. "You're not doing it right, here..." He leaned next to her and put an eye behind the scope. "Like this."  
  
Kitty wasn't listening. She felt the warmth of him next to her and his half-attempt at a beard scratch her cheek. Kitty's blue eyes rolled back in her head and she slumped down with a sigh.  
  
Snake turned his head.  
  
Kitty was smiling as she lay unconscious on the floor of the helicopter. He sat her up against the far wall of the helicopter so she wouldn't fall out. What was wrong with this girl? It was the second time in a day that she had fainted.  
  
He shrugged and went back to steadying the PSG-1. She'd wake up in a bit.  



	5. Knock-out

**Here I am, its Ari! Yeeeeeehah! Let's go play blitzball and defeat Sin--ah, er, too much Final Fantasy X for this lil' otaku gal...^_^;;; Okay, lesse, not much to say right now. Well, finals are coming for this author here, and so the next chapter is going to be a bit...er...delayed. ^_^;;; So, sorry 'bout that. Also, the story gets really odd from here-on out, and the next chapter is even kookier. So, don't be expecting a big great finale. I suck at wrapping things up. O_o Okay, now the disclaimer part thingy: Snake and Otacon belong to Konami, and the other chars belong to me. Although some are based on people I know...hehehe...ahem. Anyway. Bad Ronald, I figured out a way to get you in, so, wait for it! ^_~ It'll be in chapter 7 or 8, methinks. Anyway. On with the story!!! Oh, BTW, this chapter is short, so...gomen nasai, minna-san. ^_^;;**

Luckily, Kitty woke up only a few minutes later. The other aircraft were approaching quickly, and Snake was having a hard time hitting them for some reason.   
  
_Not so easy out in the real world, now is it Snake?_ Kitty thought smugly.   
  
"More ammo--now!" he shouted.  
  
Kitty rubbed an ear. "You don't have to shout so loud, you know, I have--_had_ half-decent hearing." Kitty tossed Snake another clip as the helicopter jerked.  
  
"Can you keep the thing still, Snickers!? What kind of a pilot are you?" Snake screamed as he reloaded. He had nearly dropped the clip out of the 'copter.  
  
"The best you can get on such short notice, wise arse!" she yelled back. She pulled down a lower-eyelid and stuck out her tongue in Snake's direction.  
  
"What the--what does that mean?"  
  
"Its a Japanese symbol of disrespect, often used in anime--" Kitty began.  
  
Snake groaned as he lined up a shot. "Not another otaku..."  
  
"Two," Kitty corrected. She grinned and pointed to herself. "And this otaku even knows some Japanese!"  
  
"Well good for you. Now shut up."  
  
Kitty glared. "Snake-kun wa _baka_ desu ne!" (Translation: Snake is an idiot!)  
  
"Hai!" came Snicker's agreement from the front. Kitty laughed.  
  
Snake just groaned again. "Yeah. Right." He fired the first shot of the clip.  
  
"OW!" Kitty gasped. "Loud..."  
  
"Got one!" Snake announced. "Their first helicopter is going down..." He lined up for another shot. "Three left..."  
  
_BANG! BANG!_  
  
"Yeah! Two left!"  
  
Kitty raised an eyebrow. "Um, did getting younger also make you lose some of your maturity, Snake?"  
  
_BANG! _ "One more..."_ BANG!_ "GOT IT! YEAH!" Snake stopped. "What the hell is wrong with me?"  
  
"With you, goodness only knows. Now, to the compound, right?" Snickers asked. Kitty nodded. "Oh, by the way, Kitty, your outfit is back there--the jumpsuit you wanted? Its got all the weapons you need attached to the belts. There's a curtain you can pull to change now, if you like."  
  
Kitty thought as Snake put away the PSG-1. "Yeah...hang on a sec." She grabbed Snake's modified M9 from the back of his belt, and fired it into his back.  
  
"Au--" He fell to the ground, and, interestingly enough, Zzz's started to float above his head. Kitty watched for a moment, amused.  
  
She then nodded. "That about does it." She tied him to the opposite side of the 'copter and went to change.  
  
Snickers laughed. "Go Kitty!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Otacon was still shivering despite his captor having turned up the thermostat. He heard frantic running outside his cell, and shouts of the same demeanor. Most seemed to be female.  
  
He stood up next to the door and knocked. Once again, the brown eyes filled the slot.  
  
"We're busy, you know."  
  
"Can I at least have a blanket?" Otacon asked.  
  
The woman's voice changed. "Well, if you want a blanket--"  
  
Otacon backed away from the door. "Never mind. I think I'd rather freeze."  
  
He saw the woman's eyes become sharp. "Be that way! Fine!" Otacon heard her stomp off. But the slot wasn't closed again--  
  
The woman's distinctive footstep sounds came back and she glared in the slot.  
  
"Come here. Now."   
  
Otacon stepped closer to the hole again. The woman's face disappeared and Otacon's face was quickly covered in water.  
  
"Later, babe." She stomped off again with a happy sigh. Otacon just wiped off his glasses on his pants and sat back in his corner.  
  
_Snake, Kitty--get me out of here!_  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"I can't believe I'm wearing this," Kitty mumbled as she looked at herself. "This outfit is ridiculous."  
  
"I don't think Snake would think so," Snickers said, eyeing the almost skin-tight jumpsuit Kitty now wore. Kitty glared momentarily.  
  
"Don't even remind me. A little while ago..." _I would've wanted him to look at me that way... _ she finished in her mind. Then again, she never thought he'd actually come to life other than in some oddball cosplay with a vastly overweight guy trying to look cool while wearing a skin tight suit. _Ew._  
  
Snickers gave the controls temporarily to Kitty as she went in the back and searched through a trunk. She came back to the front with a half-skirt that didn't fully wrap around the waist.  
  
"Put this around you, and leave the slit where your gun is," Snickers explained as she took back the steering. "Simple, but it works."  
  
"But does it have to be pink?" Kitty whined as she put it on. Snickers laughed and shook her head.  
  
"They didn't have it in any other color. I would've preferred white, but no, they didn't." She shrugged. "Anyway, we're near landing, and you'd better wake up Snake. He ought to see if anything's coming up."  
  
Kitty adjusted the skirt and took out what appeared to be smelling salts from her belt and waved it in front of Snake's nose. He slowly shook himself awake. Snake looked up at Kitty and began to strike out, only to be stopped by his constraints tied to the 'copter's side. He grimaced.  
  
"Why did you knock me--out?" He looked up at Kitty's outfit. Then he looked down, up, down, and back up again. "Knock...out..."  
  
She sighed. "Oh, shut up." She began to untie him. "We're close to landing. We need you to check things out and...ah...stuff, you know?" Kitty tossed the ropes to the back of the 'copter's cabin. As she searched for a hair scrunchie, she looked back at Snake and warned, "No funny business. Got that?"  
  
Snake grunted and looked outside the helicopter. There was a convenient landing pad within sight and a large compound that was connected to it. The landing pad had one 'copter on it already, and room for four or five more. Snake smiled inside. They wouldn't need that much space anymore...  
  
"See anything that's gonna kill us yet, Snake?" Kitty asked as she put up her hair. Half of it fell from the ponytail and she sighed. "Stupid short hair...Snake. SNAKE!"  
  
"Oh, yeah, doesn't seem to be any defensive measures," Snake said, leaning out the door a bit. Kitty had the passing thought of shoving him out of the helicopter, but then she'd be all by her lonesome on this mission. Then again, Snake did have a way of surviving the impossible...  
  
Too late for any action from Kitty, Snake leaned back into the 'copter. He looked at Kitty again with a half smile.  
  
Kitty growled, "I'm no Mei Ling. No flirting."  
  
Snake looked taken aback. He pointed a finger directly in Kitty's face. "How did you know about--"  
  
The 'copter jerked. Snake fell to the back of the helicopter on a few gun cases while Kitty was propelled to the front.  
  
"SNICKERS!" Snake yelled. Kitty looked up at the pilot.  
  
Snickers just grinned and shrugged. "Sorry," she sang. "Accident..."  
  
She winked at Kitty who laughed. At least someone was on her side.


	6. Crush Revelations

**And welcome to another chapter of Anya's Dream Date! This is Ari, and I hate to say it, but this chapter is short. And I mean, short. But it reveals a bit more about the, er, "plot." School's going easier for me, so expect another one soon (read: in the next week or so). Sorry, I know I'm a slow updater! ^^;; Well, lesse, Konami owns Snake and Otacon, and er...yeah. So, enjoy!**

Snickers landed the helicopter expertly, and sat back in the pilot's seat as Snake frantically looked about for some better weapons. He currently only had his M9. As he searched, Snickers and Kitty chatted.  
  
"So, ah, how'd you become a helicopter pilot?" Kitty asked politely.  
  
Snickers laughed and blushed. "Ah...well, that's an odd story. You see, I went to bed last night in my house...and I woke up in this 'copter knowing how to fly it." She sat up straight, a hand behind her head. "Then Jayna called me, and well..."  
  
Kitty blinked. "So Snake is a game character for you, too?"  
  
Snickers eyes widened. "You mean, you know too? About Metal Gear Solid--"  
  
"And MGS2! Precisely!" Kitty finished. They both nodded.  
  
"So we were _ both_ dragged into this..." Snickers looked around the cockpit and found a place to hang her headphones. She looked at Kitty. "Then I'm coming in with you."  
  
Kitty blinked again. "But you're supposed to be the pilot in this, er, story I guess..."  
  
Snickers adjusted her hat and tightened her skirt's belt. "And let you save the _ gorgeous_ Otacon by yourself? I think not," she said, standing up. "I'm gonna be a merc now!"  
  
Kitty laughed. "So you had a video game character crush, too?"  
  
Snickers blushed. "Yup."  
  
The two girls high-fived. "Yeah!"  
  
Snickers grinned widely. "Just call me by codename and I'll be there!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
A masked guard walked up to the brown-eyed woman.  
  
"Ma'am, they've landed on the helipad. Should we capture them?"  
  
The woman laughed and continued playing her Gameboy Advance. "No, let them come. I love a challenge."  
  
The guard bowed. "Yes, ma'am."  
  
As the guard left, a figure stepped out from the shadows.  
  
"You underestimate him and the girl." Spurs clicked on the floor. The _ marble_ floor.  
  
"Ocelot! I told you, take those ridiculous things off! You're going to scratch the floor, you nincompoop!" the woman said, not taking her eyes off the GBA's small, dimly lit screen. "And get me my GBA light! I can't see a darn thing of what's going on!"  
  
Ocelot stepped back quickly. He began to jerk violently, and his voice--and hair--changed.  
  
"Why should I, woman?" an English-lilted voice demanded. The woman turned around to face Liquid.  
  
"Because I said so, you British moron!" The lady then turned back to her screen, only to find she had died. "Ooh, you...made...me...DIE!"  
  
"Oh, shut up, its only a video game." Liquid began to saunter away.  
  
The woman stomped up to Liquid.  
  
"And you're only a video game _character_!" She kicked him in the butt with the toe of her high heel shoe.  
  
"Oww--urgh--OW!" The voice changed back to Ocelot. He rubbed his backside as he walked off. "Damn arm..."  
  
As the woman sat back down on her "throne" of sorts, she yelled in his direction, "And take those dumb spurs off! No eighteen year old in their right mind--or _MINDS_--would wear those!"  
  
"She's right, you know," a British voice came from down the hallway.   
  
"Shut up, you stupid, useless git--" Ocelot stopped. "Aw, now he's got me speaking British!"  
  
The woman laughed as the egos continued to battle. This was even more fun to watch in real life than in MGS2...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Otacon continued to shiver in his cell when the door opened. He huddled in the corner, fearing the woman with the brown eyes. Instead, a woman almost entirely dressed in blue walked in.  
  
She had on dark blue jeans, a blue sleeveless top, long blue gloves and boots that zipped up to her mid-calf. Her dark brown hair was tied up in a braid, twisted into a loose bun atop her head. She walked with an elegance that cannot be described.   
  
She came up to Otacon, kneeled down next to him, and handed him a thick blanket.  
  
Her eyes shone in the darkness, and her blue eye shadow glittered.  
  
"I am Katana Angel. Do not fear. Snake and Kitty are here now. They will come for you." She stood up slowly. As she turned to leave, Otacon saw the long blade strapped to her back. On her shirt's shoulder blades were two small painted wings. "Stay warm, Hal. She's too worried to deal with you right now." She shut the door behind her, not making a noise.  
  
Otacon wrapped the blanket around himself tightly. His shivering stopped. And he actually fell asleep.


	7. Threats and Comebacks

**Hey y'all, Ari here. Wow, seven chapters already? Yeesh. Whodathunk that a spur of the moment story inspired by a certain person's love for Hal Emmerich would go on this far? Yikes! Well, just to forewarn you, the story gets even weaker from here on out, so don't be expecting a great ending. I suck at those. And, well, yeah. O_o Lesse, what else is there to say? Oh yeah, Bad Ronald, your mini-cameo is in this chapter, so, I hope you like it. I couldn't figure out how else to fit you in, so this little appearance is all I could do. Gomen nasai! ^_^;;;; I'm actually finished with the story (10 chapters total--whoa!), but chapters 8-10 need revising, so you're just gonna hafta wait. ^_^;;; Okay, and the lovely disclaimer: Konami owns Snake, Ocelot/Liquid, and Otacon, and McDonald's Inc (???) owns Ronald McDonald, and I own...uh...stuff. So, on with the story, yeeeeeehaaaaaah!!!!**

Snake sneaked outside the building, his footsteps making nary a sound. His M9 held close, he looked around a corner.  
  
CRASH BANG "OOF!" Snake jumped and pointed the gun, ready to fire.  
  
Kitty sat up and blushed sheepishly. "Sorry, I, ah, I'm a bit of a klutz."  
  
Snake shook his head and leaned against the wall. Snickers giggled and shouldered her bag.  
  
"A bit..." He continued sneaking again, and both girls followed closely. They entered the building, and Snake turned a corner. He turned back, his eyes all disoriented.  
  
"What? Snake, are you okay?" Kitty asked. She kneeled down next to a slumping Snake. "Snake, did they hit you?"  
  
Snake looked blank. "Ahe...dah..."  
  
Snickers took a peek around the corner and slapped her forehead as she looked back at Kitty. Kitty's eyes flashed up.  
  
"Women," Snickers said, sighing. Kitty smacked Snake upside the head immediately.  
  
"You moron. They're the bad people!" Kitty whispered hoarsely. She grabbed her own modified M9 and peeked around the corner.   
  
The woman guard was dressed in what seemed to be spandex with a low-cut front. She carried only what seemed to be a heavy-duty tranquilizer gun. Kitty took aim, and squeezed the trigger.  
  
The dart hit her in the neck, and the woman fell to the ground. And, as had happened before with Snake, Zzz's floated above her head. Kitty cheered silently and holstered the M9.  
  
Snickers gave Kitty a quiet high-five, then went to drag the sleeping lady to a nearby box to hide her. Kitty stepped next to Snake and kicked him.  
  
"Wha--oh, yeah, right. Did you get her?" His voice raised in interest.  
  
Kitty crossed her eyes. She glared down at him. "Yes, and Snickers is hiding her right now, you sicko."  
  
Snake looked up innocently. "What? I was wondering if it was okay to talk loudly yet..."  
  
"Yeah, right. Now no more freaking out, got that?" Kitty reprimanded. Snake looked down.   
  
"Yeah, I got it. Let's keep going."  
  
They went deeper and deeper into the hideout. And they hid more and more sleeping women in lockers and other various locales--none were killed, per Kitty's insistence.  
  
They were being watched.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Katana Angel stood next to the woman vigilantly. Her sword was strapped to her back, and her arms were at her side.   
  
Ocelot stood on the other side, managing to stay in his own personality rather than that of Liquid's. His spurs were gone by the woman's orders, and instead they were attached to his belt.   
  
The woman was watching her laptop's screen carefully. Snake and the girl were good. But who was the other one? She looked like a wacky flight attendant.   
  
"Shall I take care of the third, Katakana?" Ocelot asked, stepping up. The woman waved him off.  
  
"I know you. You'll double and triple cross me, Ocelot. Stay right where you are." Katakana shot a look at him. "Plus, you're a miserable shot."  
  
He coughed. "What--I--aurhg--"  
  
Angel looked down. Not again. She hated dealing with Liquid more than Katakana did. She stepped back a bit, so she would be hidden from Liquid's view.  
  
"I'll have you know I'm a better shot than you!" Liquid's sardonic voice shouted. He pointed a finger in Katakana's face. "You should be _ begging_ me to go out there and kill Snake and the other two girls!"   
  
"Don't point that finger at me, Liquid. You're from the crappy side of the gene pool and you know it quite well." Katakana donned an English accent. "'I got the weak, recessive genes...'"  
  
Liquid went to hit her, and Angel stepped up, her katana drawn. She put it to Liquid's arm. Liquid squirmed and switched back to Ocelot.  
  
"You don't want your other arm cut off now, do you?" she threatened coolly. Ocelot quickly withdrew his arm and stomped off.  
  
Katakana sat still as Angel sheathed her katana once more. She tapped the keyboard, her painted nails flashing in the screen's light.  
  
"You know, I think I liked it better when he had spurs. At least then I could hear him coming." She stood up, setting the laptop on a table next to her. "I'm going to visit the other prisoners. You wait for Snake and Kitty and bring them here. Get rid of the other, if you wish." Katakana walked off, her high heels clicking neatly.  
  
Angel began the walk to the main battle chamber. She wanted to do this without shedding any blood.  
  
She stopped and changed her direction. She headed for Otacon's cell.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Kitty was pleased with the way Snake had been acting. No more ogling over the other women finally. Maybe now he'd take a good look at her.  
  
Snake began to walk around one corner, only to quickly rebound. He gestured for Snickers and Kitty to be quiet and look around the corner. Kitty took a glance.  
  
Three guards were patrolling a door, the only way further into the compound. Kitty came back and sat down for a moment.  
  
Snickers' eyes lit up and she dug into her duffel bag quietly. Snake and Kitty watched, interested, as she pulled out a flashlight and a small, odd-looking figurine. It was like a Ronald McDonald figure, but holding a large bazooka and in a darker outfit. She stuck it around the corner and put the flashlight behind it.  
  
"Rarh! Rarh! Rarh!" the figurine shouted out. The guards looked and saw the huge shadow of the figurine. After some girly shrieks, they could be heard trampling away. Snickers then put the figurine and flashlight back in her bag.  
  
Kitty and Snake just stared for a moment until Snickers spoke.  
  
"Ah, its an action figurine, Bad Ronald. He's...er...a friend of mine." Snickers blushed and waved Snake and Kitty on ahead.  
  
The three entered a large room, and Snickers shut the door behind them.  
  
"No! Don't--" Kitty and Snake began. Too late. The door slammed shut with a loud crash. Snickers shrunk next to the door.  
  
"Sorry..."  
  
The lights in the room went out. Kitty crowded next to Snake, who held her absentmindedly. Snickers began searching through the duffel bag she had been carrying with her.  
  
"Found it! Here you go..." Snickers switched on the flashlight and pointed it at Kitty and Snake. She giggled. "Don't get any ideas, you two..."  
  
Kitty blushed. Snake grinned, his teeth reflecting the light.  
  
A spotlight shone on a blue-clad figure in the room. She bowed.  
  
"Hello. I am Katana Angel." She looked at the three in turn. "Solid Snake. Dagger Kitty. And Snickers. I am here to help you." Angel looked at Snickers and smiled faintly. "The person you want to see is here." Snickers smiled and began looking. Angel snapped her fingers and another spotlight appeared. And underneath it was...  
  
"Otacon!" Snake, Kitty, and Snickers all shouted. Otacon looked up, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders.  
  
Snickers then realized he didn't have a shirt on. "_Hal_..."  
  
Otacon blinked and everyone watched as Snicker's dug deep into her duffel bag. She let out a mini-shout of joy and pulled out a t-shirt with some Japanese characters on it. She ran up and handed it to Otacon, who quickly put it on without thinking. Kitty laughed as she recognized the hiragana on it.  
  
"Snickers..." Kitty giggled along with Snickers. The shirt read "Tessa-chan no bishounen." Tessa's pretty boy.  
  
Katana Angel took this time to step up and talk to Snake.  
  
"We need a plan. Katakana will not be pleased when she finds Otacon gone." She looked up quietly. "She has others hostage, and Ocelot on her side."  
  
"Ocelot? That means Liquid's here too..." Snake stood in thought for a moment. "Who are the other hostages?"  
  
Katana Angel waited for a moment before continuing. "A man codenamed Raiden, his betrothed, Rosemary, and..." She paused and took a deep breath. "And Emma Emmerich."  
  
Snake was actually shocked. Otacon ran up next to Angel.  
  
"Emma? E. E.'s..._alive_?"  



	8. Live and Dye

**Chapter 8. Wow. Two chapters left and this'll be finished!!! Wowweee. Let's see, anything important to say? Um...it gets even weaker from here on out, so, gomen nasai (sorry)... Oh, Shin, you're introduced in this one. ^_^ And now for the disclaimer: Konami owns Ocelot, Snake, Otacon, Raiden, Rose, and Emma, and I own...ah...an old 386 laptop to type it on. Hehe. No kiddin', that's what I typed a lot of this on. Seriously. No, quit laughing! ... ... ... Well, then, on with the story! Little re-cap: Katana Angel is a good person, Katakana is the name of the bad-lady, and Emma's alive! Yeah! Here we goooo!**

"Emma? E. E.'s...alive?"  
  
Kitty's mind froze. Emma. Emma...Vamp...Emma...  
  
"Emma's alive!?" Snickers and Kitty shouted. Otacon began crying and Snake stood next to him, patting his back. The pain was obviously still fresh with Otacon. Katana Angel then took that moment to go to Snickers and Kitty.  
  
"I assume you were brought here from the real world as well?" she asked quietly. The girls looked at each other, then back at Angel, nodding. Angel continued. "Then you've both played MGS2 and seen the ending. Emma is...dead." All three looked back at the still sobbing Otacon. Snickers moved to go back to him, but Kitty grabbed a hold of her shirt and shook her head.  
  
"But you just said she was alive," Kitty said, confused.  
  
"Then allow me to rephrase what I just said: Emma _ was_ dead. She's alive now, in a holding cell with Rosemary. Raiden is in his own holding cell, probably getting a forced tan and hair-dye at the moment," Angel said, shaking her head.  
  
"I always did think he was a bit too pasty," Kitty noted.   
  
"Anyway, Snake, Otacon, Emma, Raiden, Rose, and Ocelot were all brought to life accidentally by Katakana--"  
  
"They were brought to life by a Japanese alphabet?" Snickers asked, confused. Angel shook her head politely.  
  
"No, Katakana is the name of the villain." Angel bowed a bit. "I should've explained that earlier. Katakana is the woman who had been keeping Otacon hostage, and the one who made him undress to use his Codec."  
  
Snickers curled up a fist. "That...ooh..."  
  
"You'll get your revenge soon enough. But now we need to save Emma, Raiden, and Rosemary. They are in great danger." Angel gestured to all four people. "Come, follow me."  
  
"Wait--w-w-ait right there!" Kitty whirled around and saw a shaky, tall man holding an AK. He had to be at least 6 feet tall, and had darkish features. "Stop!"  
  
Katana Angel shook her head. "Shin, I told you to wait..."  
  
"Wh-wh-where are you taking them?" he shouted. He looked at Snickers, bewildered. His face turned bright red. "And--"  
  
Katana Angel walked up to him and whispered into his ear. He immediately relaxed his shoulders and sighed. Angel smiled gently then went back to the group.  
  
"Everyone, this is Dark Shin, my, ah...accomplice. He's been staying undercover as well. He didn't know I had told you all that yet," she explained. Shin stepped up next to Snickers.  
  
"Sorry. I ah--didn't know I was a good guy yet." He chuckled and put a hand behind his head.  
  
Kitty shook her head. _Oy_.  
  
"I will show you where Emma and Rosemary are being held. Come." Angel quickly led the group of seven out of the dark room and into the cramped compound hallways.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Katakana watched with glee as Raiden, a.k.a. Jack, was being dipped in a pool of warm water. Namely, his shock white hair. Katakana whistled happily as she put on some hairstyling gloves and grabbed the brown dye. It was a good thing she had taped Raiden's mouth shut, or else he would've been whining even louder than he currently was.  
  
"This is for your own good, you know," she said as she lathered the soap into his hair. He continued to struggle as she washed.  
  
Ocelot looked on in an odd sort of interest. This was a new type of torture to him. He was used to electric tables and currents surging through the victim, not...not a forced make-over. This boss certainly had a weird way of doing things.  
  
Liquid then took over his consciousness. He left the "torture chamber," and left to go look for his new object of affection, Katana Angel. She had to be here somewhere...  
  
Katakana continued to sing to herself as she cut and styled Raiden's hair into a short, messy bowl cut. She then made him dress in short shorts and slip into a tanning bed--sans tape, of course. Then he'd have one weird tan line on his face.  
  
She leaned against the door to the tanning bed room. Maybe he'd look a bit better now. Not much, but a bit.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rosemary sat next to the young Emma Emmerich in the cramped cell. Emma was humming to herself, playing with her glasses. Rose looked on, a bit confused. Wasn't this girl...didn't Raiden say she had died? Nonetheless, she did seem rather nice, if not a bit disconnected from the world.  
  
She finally spoke. "Who are you?" The girl's voice scared Rose at first, making her jump a bit. Emma laughed lightly. "Sorry..."  
  
"Ah, its...its okay. I'm Rose. And you?"  
  
"Emma Emmerich. Hal's, ah...friend." Emma giggled as she put her glasses back on.  
  
Rose thought for a moment. "Aren't you brother and sister?"  
  
Emma scowled a bit. "Yeah, we are. But only 'cuz my mom and his dad got married." Emma looked around the room a bit. "So...why are you here?"  
  
Rose laughed. "I don't know. But I saw Jack here earlier." She sighed. "He'll come get me." Rose quickly looked over at Emma. "I mean, get _us_."  
  
Emma smiled simply. "Don't worry. Hal will come for me! It won't--it won't be like last time..." She trailed off and began to play with her hair, twisting a brown around her fingers.  
  
Rose didn't ask. She thought it best that way.  
  
She hoped Jack came soon.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Katana Angel and Shin headed up the group as they rounded corners. Kitty and Snickers especially looked on in interest as the compound vaguely resembled the building in the Shadow Moses incident.   
  
_Well, they were both islands, so why not? _ Kitty thought. Lost in her thoughts, she ran into Snake's back. The group had stopped. She peeked around Snake to see what the problem was.  
  
Angel was tight against the next corner, a finger to her lips. She made a gesture, as if twirling a gun on one finger.  
  
"Ocelot?" Snake mouthed. Angel nodded. She waved the group back and headed around the corner.  
  
"Ah, Angel, what a pleasant surprise," an English voice said. Angel's shoes shuffled on the floor.  
  
"Hello, Liquid." An odd, clicking type sound came along with cowboy boot footsteps.   
  
"Like the sound?" he asked, walking around Angel.  
  
Her face contorted a bit. "What is that?"  
  
Liquid pulled a small box from his belt and shook it. "Tic-Tacs. Katakana got sick of not knowing when Ocelot was coming." He stuffed the box back in a pocket. "I guess those stupid spurs do have use after all."  
  
Angel bowed curtly. "Its been lovely, Liquid, but I must be going--"  
  
Liquid put a hand on her shoulder. "Oh, no, Katakana is busy with the blond boy. She doesn't need to see you."  
  
Kitty sighed silently. Where was a personality shift when you needed one?   
  
Katana Angel slapped his hand away. "I don't have time for this, Liquid."   
  
"Why, I--aurgh--" Ocelot shook his head. He looked at his right hand. "That stupid man." He looked back up at Angel, and stared her in the eyes. "Where's Snake?"  
  
"What?"  
  
He pressed his face closer. "Where's Snake?"  
  
Angel stepped back. He obviously hadn't used the Tic-Tacs at all. "I don't know what you're talking about. I couldn't find them."  
  
Ocelot pushed her away and stomped around the corner. Kitty had an M9 pointed at his stomach.  
  
"Nighty-night." She pulled the trigger, and the dart went into his stomach. Snake grabbed his six shooter and Ocelot fell to the floor.  
  
Ocelot groaned once and became Liquid. He glanced at Snake. "Brother..." Snake stepped back a bit.  
  
Shin whacked him over the head once with his AK. Ocelot's form fell limp. Snake felt for a pulse.  
  
"He's still alive. Let's find a place to stuff him in quick."  
  
While Snake and Kitty pulled Ocelot into a locker, Snickers spent this time consoling the still crying Otacon.  
  
"Emma's alive! I can...I can talk to her!" Otacon sobbed happily.  
  
Snickers smiled. "Yeah, see? Everything's gonna work out, Hal." Snickers gave him a quick hug. He returned it.  
  
THUD. Angel whirled around at the noise, katana drawn. It sounded like someone falling. She sheathed the sword as she saw Snickers, a smile on her face, lying on the floor. Otacon stood, confused, and a bit shaken.  
  
"Wha--wha?" he stuttered. Angel got smelling salts from inside Snicker's duffel bag and woke Snickers up.  
  
Snickers blushed horribly as she came to. "Sorry, sorry." She sprang up next to Otacon, her hair flying into her face. "I, uh, haven't had anything to eat." She bounced up and down a bit as she shouldered her bag. Shin's ears perked up upon hearing this. He stood next to Snickers. 

"There's a kitchen near here. Katakana's got some fine chefs."  
  
Otacon nodded. "The chicken is pretty good."  
  
Snickers thrust an arm into the air. "To the kitchens, then!"  
  
Kitty and Snake walked back in.  
  
"Where are we going?" they both asked.  
  
Snickers grabbed Otacon's hand and followed Shin's lead. "To the kitchen for some grub!"  
  
As if on cue, both Snake's and Kitty's stomachs rumbled. They looked at each other.  
  
"Let's go."


	9. The Magic of Rations

**Gomen nasai, minna-san. I was planning on updating earlier, but I got sidetracked (I got the flu then a pile-up of homework....-_-;;) Anyway, one chapter left after this. Wowee. Ah, lesse...someone gets shot in this one! O_O and its not a bad guy, nor is it with a tranq gun. Who is it? I'm not telling...just read it! ^_^ And the lovely disclaimer: Konami owns Snake, Ocelot, Otacon, Emma, Rose, and Raiden. Well, here goes then!**  
  
Katakana, pleased with the results of Raiden's makeover, stuck him back in his cell. She had been tempted to leave the tape on his mouth, but that would mean tying him back up and other things she didn't have time for. She'd just have to deal with a bit of his whiny voice floating through the hallways every once in a while.  
  
She sat back down on her throne and grabbed her laptop. Switching the camera screen views several times, she finally came upon Snake and Kitty's group.  
  
She slammed a fist on the keyboard, causing the Start menu to pop up. She closed it and looked back at the screen. Katana Angel and a guard--helping them? What the heck was with that? Katakana blew at her bangs. It figured, even outside the video game there would be betrayals. Although, if she remembered correctly, that particular guard wasn't exactly that good anyway. Why would Angel need that guy's help?  
  
"I still have Ocelot." She grabbed her radio off her small belt. "Ocelot, come in." Katakana waited a bit. Tapping her foot, she called again. "Ocelot, you moron, come IN!" As no answer came, she shifted her lips to one side of her mouth. "Ocelot, you dense cowboy, respond!" she shouted through gritted teeth. No answer.   
  
She threw the radio down.   
  
"If you want something done right, do it yourself," she remarked, putting her laptop aside. Katakana called a few guards up, and had preparations made.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Shin dug through the kitchen cabinets, knowing where everything was immediately. He had had off-duty snacks many times here before. He set out a small meal of fried chicken and tossed some drinks to everyone.  
  
"Isn't there any beer?" Snake asked grumpily. Kitty looked at him, smirking.  
  
"Ah, Snake, you're eighteen. You're not old enough to have beer yet." She tapped him on the nose lightly as she took a swig of her Diet Coke. He frowned and gulped down some Coke.  
  
"Its bad for you anyway, Snake," Otacon pointed out, trying to drink milk as Snickers clung to his arm. He switched hands. "I've told you that enough."  
  
"It tastes better. I still have my smokes, anyway." Snake dug around in his pouches on his suit. His eyes were wide with alarm. "My smokes?!"  
  
Kitty waved a small carton in front of him. He went to grab them, but Kitty pulled them back.  
  
"If you work with me, no smoking. Got it?" She gave him a stern look.  
  
"Fine." Snake drank the rest of the soda and slammed the can down on the counter. It crumpled itself flat. "No smoking."  
  
"Good." Kitty tossed the carton to Shin. "Toss these in the garbage disposal, will you?" Shin nodded, and Snake looked like he was on the verge of breaking. Kitty sighed. "Its not that bad, Snake, you'll get used to it! Okay?"  
  
Snake looked away from her and over at Snickers and Otacon. "Yeah, right." Snake grabbed a piece of chicken from a plate. He chewed furiously, completely silent.  
  
Angel began pacing. Surely Katakana knew by now...why hadn't she done anything? No guards, no alert, nothing. Angel sat down upon one of the countertops to think. What was Katakana doing now?  
  
It struck her. They were being expected. And so, Katakana would make a show no doubt. A show of the...  
  
"We've got to go now!" she shouted, making everyone jump. Chicken fell out of Snake's mouth, making Kitty giggle. He looked at her, but couldn't get mad. He laughed because Kitty had chicken stuck in her teeth.  
  
Otacon, Snickers, and Shin just stood, bewildered. Angel looked around.  
  
"Now, to the main chamber! Katakana--and the hostages!" She ran out the door, not waiting for the rest to follow.  
  
"Emma!" Otacon ran after Angel, dragging Snickers along with him. Shin followed Snickers, and Kitty and Snake just stayed put.  
  
"You have meat stuck in your teeth," Snake said, dropping more chicken out of his mouth and pointing at her front teeth. She swished some soda between her teeth as Snake finished swallowing the poultry. Kitty flashed a smile.  
  
"How's that?" she asked.  
  
Snake smiled to himself. He looked at her eyes, her hair...her lips...he bent down a bit, a little bit closer to her.  
  
"SNAAAAAAAAKE!" Snickers shouted, making both Kitty and Snake jump. They looked at the door. Snickers and Otacon were peeking in the door.  
  
"Snake, there isn't time for that now! We've got to save Emma!" Otacon reprimanded. Snake put a hand behind his head, embarrassed. Snickers watched, amused.  
  
"Well, the legendary Solid Snake, blushing and embarrassed? Age certainly changed you, didn't it?" Snickers remarked. Kitty just sighed and took Snake's hand.  
  
"Let's go!" she shouted, and ran past Otacon and Snickers to follow Shin and Katana Angel.  
  
Otacon was right. Romance would have to wait.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Katana Angel headed up the group as they ran into the main chamber. It was almost pitch black, except for a small blue-green light emanating from the throne. A figure sat in the throne, its head facing downwards.  
  
"Welcome, everyone," her voice came. She looked up, smiling. "Took you all long enough, however."   
  
"Katakana," Angel whispered to the group. Snickers clenched a fist.  
  
"You took advantage of my poor Hal!" she yelled, pointing a finger at Katakana. "You...you...you slut!"  
  
Katakana feigned shock, putting a hand to her chest. "Me? Take _ advantage_ of? You must be mistaken, girl. Hal was mine to begin with!" She clapped her hands, and a spotlight shone on the group. Katakana looked at Otacon. Her eyes began to gleam as she looked at Otacon's shirt. "Who is Tessa?" she growled.  
  
Snickers stepped forward, pointing to her nose. "Me."  
  
Otacon looked confused. He finally looked down at his shirt and read the kana. "Hey!"  
  
Snickers turned back to him, blushing furiously. "Sorry, but you're just so kawaii...and charming, and kind..."  
  
Otacon turned red. "You...you really think so?"  
  
"Of course--augh!" Snickers fell over as a bullet hit her in the leg.  
  
"TESSA!" Kitty shouted. Snickers began to sob.  
  
"It...it never hurt...the game..."  
  
Kitty drew her M9 and pointed it at Katakana's chest. The laser sight trembled on its target.  
  
"Nah ah ah." Katakana wiggled a finger at Kitty. "Its not me you want, if you want her shooter." Ocelot stepped out of the shadows, twirling his revolver around a finger. He put it back in its holster. Katakana looked at Ocelot. "Thank you very much."  
  
Ocelot bowed. "You're welcome, Boss." He looked at Snake. "So, we meet again. Its been awhile, Snake."  
  
Kitty went to help Snickers, but a shot went off at her feet. Ocelot had his revolver out again.  
  
"This is as bad as Sniper Wolf," Kitty commented absentmindedly. Both Otacon and Snake stared.  
  
"How'd you know Wolf?" Snake asked. Kitty's eyes widened. She tried to think of an explanation, but with Ocelot's gun and Snickers crying in pain...  
  
"Just the way I know all about Hal here," Katakana said, finally standing up. She began to pace. Snake took out his SOCOM and shot. The bullet rebounded away from Katakana and into the throne.  
  
"Magnetic field...Fortune," Kitty said. She looked at the rest of the group for help. No one knew what to do.  
  
"Ocelot, take Tessa here and do what you wish," Katakana said, waving a hand. "And have someone bring out the other three."  
  
Otacon started for Snickers. "Tess..." Katakana glared.   
  
Ocelot grabbed one of Snickers' arms, but was quickly smacked in the head by a large, nylon object. Snickers' duffel bag. Ocelot fell on her and she grabbed his gun and hit him over the head with the handle. His body went limp again. She kicked him off with her good leg, breathing heavily. Otacon took a chance and grabbed Snickers away from the middle of the room. He pulled Snickers to the side and held her for a moment.   
  
"Bandages in the bag," she said quickly. She held onto her leg, blood covering her hands. Otacon began to dig through the bag, and Kitty and Snake walked forward.  
  
"You aren't going to get away with that, you know," Kitty snarled. Katakana put out a hand.  
  
"Wait a minute, girl. I still have negotiating power, you know," she said, grabbing her radio. She spoke into it. "Jinny, bring in the others." Some garbled voices came over the radio. Katakana began to fume. She began shouting into the radio. "I don't care if you're in the middle of a game of Ker-Plunk, I want those three down here NOW!" Katakana slammed the radio down. "Completely useless..." She tapped her fingers on one of the throne's arms. Kitty went for a shot with the M9, but it missed as well.  
  
"Oh, stop it, you know its useless." Katakana sighed. "With intelligence like that, I bet you couldn't even beat MGS2 on Very Easy."  
  
Kitty grumbled under her breath. This was not how she wanted to show off to Snake. She began to walk up to Katakana, ready to knock her lights out. Snake pulled her back.  
  
"Ah, that may not be the best COA, Kitty," he said quietly. "She still has the hostages." Kitty growled to herself and stood still again next to Snake. Her eyes were locked with Katakana's.  
  
As this was happening, Otacon wrapped Snickers' bare leg in the bandage, and took out some pain pills as well.   
  
"You came prepared for everything, didn't you?" Otacon asked gently. Snickers nodded weakly.  
  
"Otaku's motto," she mumbled, smiling. "I even have a cosplay outfit in there." Otacon laughed. He put a few pain meds in her mouth and tipped some bottled water down her throat. "Thanks." An idea popped into Snickers head. "Hal, find the ration pack in there, will you?" He nodded slowly, and pulled out a packet of army rations. Snickers quickly downed the food, and then looked at her bandaged leg.  
  
The blood was gone, as was the bandage. A small bullet slug was on the floor near her knee. Otacon blinked several times.  
  
"But...it was just..."  
  
Snickers put a finger to his lips. "Don't ask. Its best not to ask questions sometimes." Otacon nodded, not entirely understanding.  
  
"Kitty! Look!" Kitty tore her gaze away from glaring at Katakana to turn and look at Snickers. Kitty's eyes widened. Snickers waved her leg around. "Look, Kitty, no wound!"  
  
Kitty thought for all of a split second before she knew what had happened. "Ration?" Snickers nodded. Katakana continued to tap her fingers when the guards finally came in, three people in tow.  
  
Otacon looked up. His eyes began to well up.  
  
"E.E....Emma!"


	10. Who's Game?

**snif snif The final chapter! crying I can't believe it! Well, thanks to Otaku Tess, Bad Ronald, UndyingAngel, Kizoku Mika, and anyone else I might have forgotten. Oh yeah, DUH! DarkShin! ^_^;;; Just as I'm talking to you too...boy, am I an idiot...anyhoo. Look at the end of this for reflections, etc, so I won't spoil y'all. ^_^ Disclaimer: I don't own Snake, Ocelot, Otacon, et.al, Konami does. Here we go!**

Emma's eyes went to Otacon. "Hal!" She made a run for him. One of the guards grabbed her arm and kept her back.   
  
Katakana smiled and stood up once again. She began pacing. "Ah, yes, the siblings meet again. And the others..."  
  
A guard pushed Rose into the light, then followed by Raiden, who was barely recognizable, if not for his distinct whine.  
  
"Let me go!" Raiden shuffled a bit to get away from the female guard, but she just thwacked him on the shoulder to shut him up. He looked down at the floor.  
  
Kitty couldn't help but giggle. "...Raiden...hehe...ah, ah ha! Ha ha--!" Kitty got a look from the rest of the group. _Bad timing,_ Kitty thought. She'd have time to laugh later. Kitty coughed and stood up straight. She steadied her voice. "So, you have the hostages. Do you mind telling us what exactly your plan was, Katakana?" Kitty shifted her weight on one leg and put a hand on her hip.  
  
"Ah, my plan. Well, as you know, all these people come from a video game." She stopped and waited for the reactions.  
  
"What?"  
  
"A game?"  
  
"A VIDEO game?"  
  
"What the hell?"  
  
"...wha?"  
  
Katakana laughed and threw a switch on her throne. A screen on the far right wall lit up and showed scenes including all the characters from MGS2. Snake sneaking on the tanker, Otacon sobbing after Emma's death, Emma acting all "cutesy," Rose and Raiden making up, and Ocelot freaking out during a personality switch. It was then followed by the MGS2 logo, with each character taking up a small part of the screen. Katakana freeze-framed it.  
  
"As you can see, you all come from a popular video game called Metal Gear Solid 2, although Snake, Hal, and Ocelot were also in Metal Gear Solid, the original, and Snake was in Metal Gear and Metal Gear 2." Katakana thought for a bit. "We won't even go into Snake's Revenge, _ that_ was a nightmare." She coughed and clacked a few keys on the keyboard of her laptop. The screen switched to wire-frame models of each of the characters, along with their final in-game models. "These models are all from MGS2, as it is often known."  
  
Snake shook his head. "Wait, you're saying we all came from a game? If we were in there, then how the hell did we get here?" He looked at Katakana in disbelief.  
  
"And how did Emma...how is she alive?" Otacon asked. Katakana frowned a bit as Emma tilted her head.  
  
"I was dead?"  
  
Katakana shook her head. "Look, I don't wanna go into deep explanations right now. All that matters is you all are here right now, and you're not there. I brought you here, Hal, because I wanted both you and plans for a Metal Gear." She hit a few more keys on the keyboard, returning the screen to the MGS2 logo. She smiled. "Mainly you."  
  
Kitty groaned. "Oh, yeah, like Otacon was going to give you plans for a Metal Gear? Have you even _played_ the games?"  
  
Snake looked at her. "We...we really are from cheap VR?"  
  
Kitty stared up at her crush, smiling faintly. "Yeah, you are. But that doesn't matter now, really..." She pointed her head at Katakana.   
  
Snake followed her gaze. "Yeah, gotcha." He took his SOCOM and aimed at the ceiling above the guards heads. He shot three times and plaster and lighting fixtures fell on the three guards. Raiden, Emma, and Rose, covered in dust, made a run for it.   
  
At the same time, Kitty ran up to Katakana and tried to hit her with her bare fist. It made contact, but didn't affect Katakana at all. Instead, Kitty's fist felt like it had just been thrust into a pot of boiling water. She recoiled, waving her fist around.  
  
"OW!" She kicked Katakana, and managed to hit the magnetic-field generator on Katakana's belt. It flew across the room and landed in Angel's hands. As Katakana watched, Angel threw it up into the air and sliced it neatly in half with her katana. It sparked and fizzled as it hit the floor.  
  
Kitty grabbed her M9 without thinking and shot Katakana in the chest. As she fell, Snake went for a shot with the SOCOM. Kitty only just managed to smack the gun upwards, hitting Katakana's laptop instead.  
  
He stared at Kitty as she shook her head.  
  
"Look, she's psycho. Let's grab the choppers, get out of here, and leave Ocelot and her stranded." She grabbed Snake's hand and led the whole group out of the compound, twisting and turning quickly through every corridor. It was especially hard for Otacon, who had both Snickers and Emma clinging to him. He managed to keep up, but just barely.  
  
Snake and Kitty helped everyone load into Snickers' helicopter. While they got situated, Snake ran over to the other chopper and took out a few key components. He tossed them into the ocean, then jumped on Snickers' 'copter, pulling Kitty in with him.  
  
"All righty, everyone," Snickers shouted as she put on her headphones. Otacon also put on a pair and sat down next to her. "Here we go! Say 'bye bye, island,' and 'hello mainland!'" She pulled the chopper into the sky as quickly as she could.  
  
Rose and Raiden were busy cuddling, as Rose was admiring Raiden's new look. She held onto him tight as the flight went on. They ignored everyone else on the flight.  
  
Katana Angel sat back in the ammunition and guns, content to know her job had been done, and done well. She watched as Shin and Emma both sat, dejected. Both their crushes had gone to someone else. Namely, Snickers and Otacon. So instead of crying, they complained to one another. Angel had to admit, they did make a nice couple. She was rather amused by it all.  
  
Kitty and Snake sat next to each other in silence. Snake finally spoke.  
  
"I'm from a video game?" he said quietly. Kitty nodded once more.  
  
"Why do you think anyone you loved died? It was to make you available for another game, for revenge," she said. Shrugging, she continued. "On the plus side, now that you're here, you don't have to be a merc anymore."  
  
Snake looked at her in interest. "Why not?"  
  
Kitty laughed. "There aren't any Metal Gears here, silly! And the Patriots and all that jazz don't exist here either." She looked into his eyes. "You don't have to fight anymore."  
  
Snake looked a bit confused. "Then what am I supposed to do?"  
  
Kitty scooted closer to him. "Ah...settle down, maybe?" She looked up at him.  
  
Snake laughed himself, then looked into Kitty's eyes. "Yeah." He leaned down. "Maybe you're right..." They locked in an embrace, and sat that way for the rest of the flight, Kitty's head resting on Snake's broad shoulders.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
When Katakana finally awoke, it was to the voice of none other than Ocelot. He was complaining about the bruise on his head, and generally making too much noise as he walked. Katakana sighed, staring at the ceiling. Hal was gone, her plan was ruined. Now what was she supposed to do?  
  
She smiled to herself. Do what any good MGS villain would do: make a comeback--and a sequel.

**.....REFLECTIONS...**

**Well, I can't believe its over. I never thought I'd actually finish this. It started as a spur of the moment story after seeing Tessa's obsession with Otacon. No kidding. So, double thanks, Tessa! ^_^ I'm not too happy with the ending, but if you like it, then great! And as for the very open ending...no, I don't plan on making a sequel. That would be waaaaay to cheesy. I have another project to start on, but if I get so inspired, I will make a sequel of sorts. And maybe even an omake for this one (an extra little story/thing, added at the end of some anime, if you were wondering.) So, until then, sayounara minna-san! Ja mata! =^.,.^= MEOW!!! ^_~** 


End file.
